Friday 29 January 2010

Big week, next week...

Probably/possibly THE big week, so far...

So far, we've had the diagnosis, the kick back from the infection, the CT and PET scans, the bone marrow biopsy, the radiology. This week, we have the potential to move up a gear.

On Tuesday, after I see "my man", I may move into a six month period I could have only imagined, only a year ago. Or, I may not. As I sit here now, that's the difficult part. Not knowing.

So far, everything that's happened to me on this journey has been pretty benign. Bad choice of word, maybe, but to be honest, it hasn't been so bad, as far as it goes. It's all been pretty immediate and "dealable-with". "This is what you need to do, and you need to do it tomorrow morning" kind of thing. No time to reflect and think.

Next week may bring in a new dawn. I really don't fancy six months of feeling crap. Or at least one week REALLY crap, one week crap, and one week slightly crap - repeat 6 or 8 times. That's from now until August. We are talking end of the football season, Wimbledon and the World Cup. And still not finished.

I'm not scared about anything. I'm disappointed. I don't fear where this is going, but I'm not happy that this is going somewhere where I don't want it to go, and there's nothing I can do about it. I am stoic. And patient. I am doing what I am told, by people who know what they're doing. At least I trust them to know what they are doing. I know that I have lots to give, and receive, and I know that these next few weeks, months and years will be difficult and rewarding, challenging and fulfilling. I have lots I want to do. And I have lots of family and friends who love and care about me and offer encouragement and support, and I am truly grateful for every bit of it.

But next week, will be a big week.

Wednesday 27 January 2010

Update while waiting for my brake fluid to be changed

I am sitting in my car dealer with an hour to kill, so it's time for an update

Since last time, I have had another CT scan and am now waiting for the result to come through. I see the haematologist next Tuesday, so we will know then what's in store. I am not looking forward to it, to be honest, but I do need to know. It's like having your life permanently on hold, waiting for the next thing to happen. Planning is very difficult, not knowing what you will need to do and having the condition always there, like the dead child in the "don't speed advert" on the TV is just something you have to live with. My guess is that it's 50:50 re treatment next week.

On a more positive note, I booked the flights for Venice in October last week, andnow need to find a hotel. The San Cassiano, where we stayed two years ago, isn't taking bookings for Oct yet, but I'd like to have somewhere booked and be able to look forward to it. Also looking at maybe a cottage on Islay in the fist two weeks of September, which will be beyond any treatment that I might or might not need to have.

Had an interesting day on Saturday at the gathering in Trafalgar Square to protest about S44. I think a point was made, but know thst it won't make any difference at all. Such is life.

More next week when I've seen my man.

Oh, yes, the Leica Forum Book entries close on Sunday. The total raised so far is now well over £6,000, which is a fantastic sum. Must post a reminder to everyone to get their shots in before Sunday night.

Tuesday 12 January 2010

Belated Happy New Year!

New Year long gone now, of course, as was our week in Scotland.

Unfortunately, with the weather we have been having all over the country, the week there wasn't quite what we were anticipating. Indeed, it weas actually only a day there, and even then, we couldn't get off the A-roads. BMWs really are rubbish when it comes to driving on compacted snow and ice. So, we returned on the Wednesday instead of the Saturday, taking advantage of a break in the snowy weather. Took no photographs to speak of. However, we had a very nice stay in The George in Inveraray. Excellent food to be had there along with very comfortable rooms.

My Dad has had to have his shoulder joint replaced, but is back out of hospital now, and seems to be on the mend, which is excellent news.

The Leica book has now raised about £5,400 so far. The date for submissions closes at the end of January, so it will be interesting to get on with the judging next month. There are around 400 shots to assess, so far, so that won't be a 5 minute task.

And, yes, I am Mr April for Telegraph readers this year. Still waiting to hear about the prize though...

Now, I just have the CT scan tomorrow morning and the aftermath of that to look forward to.

More later...